Handy

As someone who is about as handy as a person with no hands, I get inordinately proud when I've done something massively pedestrian that actual handy people would totally scoff at. I still walk past my 'even a complete blubbering moron can stick this thing together using instructions printed on chewable cardboard with bright, non threatening illustrations' kit shelf that I got from The Warehouse and think 'yeah, I put that thing together!'

So today when I sat down, listening to the thunder outside and sewed not one, not even two, but FIVE BUTTONS onto my waistcoat, well. Just call me Seamstress Fingers Dan. Sure, I ran out of black thread and so alternated the buttons with black and a lovely bright blue cotton, and yes, it could be said that I not only made a complete dog's breakfast out of the sewing, I in fact made a complete three course dog's buffet with afterdinner mints and complimentary wine selection.

But let me tell you, when I sew on some buttons, they damn well stay sewn. Those babies aren't going anywhere.